Blog Post: Stupid Interview Questions

Let’s take a look at incredibly stupid interviewing questions that are asked.  I’d love to tell you that these are only asked by HR, but I can’t.  If you’re an interviewer…please stop asking these stupid questions.  If you’re interviewing for employment, get used to them.

1).  If you were a (tree, flower, animal, etc.) what kind of (whatever) would you be?  This is one of the “cutsey” questions that is supposed to “take the pressure off” in an interview.  It does no such thing.  Pressure to point and laugh wells up inside candidates.  It tells you absolutely nothing.  Tell them some animal that is noble, a team player, and yet great alone, like a wolf.  Some tree that is strong, yet can bend, like a willow.  Try not to roll your eyes.

2).  What are the three negative thought patterns you have that have held you back in your career?  This is one of the touchy-feely questions that some idiot consultant came up with a while back, and is getting popular.  It, again, tells you nothing except the candidate’s ability to shovel effluvium rapidly.  If you’re asked, indicate something that is innocuous and/or common, like “I’m not good enough” and indicate that you’ve overcome it by understanding that yes, indeed, you are.

3).  What are your 3 biggest weaknesses?  Hmmm….chocolate, shoot-em-up movies, and sushi.  Nobody is going to answer this honestly, which is what makes it stupid.  If asked, don’t say “Gee, I guess I’m just too much of a self-motivated self-starter who is too hard on himself.”  Answer with a true weakness…that has nothing whatsoever to do with the job.  Instead of this stupid question, ask “What would an enemy say about you?  And do you agree with any of it?”

4).  Tell me about your most difficult boss.  You’re, again, going to get either whining (which actually does tell you something) or, more likely, some cliché and razzle-dazzle.  If asked, go for “tough but fair,” or “difficult, but learned the most from this person.”  Sometimes, though, bosses are just mean and useless.  You can’t say that, though, true though it may be.

5).  Why do you want to work here?  The obvious answer in this economy is because you have money and can write paychecks.  While sometimes valuable, this is also a question that is going to generate bull and little else.  Ask more specifically, e.g., “What are the two things, other than the fact that we actually still have open jobs that pay something, that might make this an OK place to work?”

6).  Would your last employer give you a good reference?  Again, this is stupid because it doesn’t generate any real information.  Get specific and ask what, exactly, a former employer would say.  You won’t get any more honesty, but you might get more interesting answers.

7).  Do you have any problems with working for (younger, older, less experienced, etc.) people than yourself?  This is because you’re an older worker and they’re trying to ask if you’re going to kill the whippersnapper that they’re going to put in charge of you.  Again, it is useless because the candidate only wants a job and will say anything.  Ask the candidate to let you know, in detail, how he or she deals with a boss who is younger or older.

8).  Have you ever filed a complaint against an employer?  Stupid question because it could wind you up in litigation.  Find this out on the background check, where any court cases will show up.  If you are an employee it is career suicide to ever file any kind of complaint or court case against an employer!  Don’t do it.  No employer in their right mind will hire you again, and these things are easily discovered even without the sophisticated background checks that employers do today.  If you’re not being treated well, or being discriminated against, just leave and work elsewhere, but, except for unemployment (perfectly safe to file) or a labor board complaint to get back pay that is being withheld (pretty safe…not entirely), don’t file anything.  And remember, everything these days is a public record and easily discoverable.

9).  What are your references like?  This is stupid because no one ever (at least knowingly) gives enemies as references.  Again, do a background check, Google the individual, and dig a bit.  If there’s dirt, it will surface.  Don’t waste time with this question.

And the A#1, Dork question of the Century is:

10). Where would you like to be in five years (or some variant thereof)?  This is the most incredibly stupid question that employers ask ever!  How the heck should any of us know where we’re going to be in five months, much less five years?  The day that companies can guarantee employment for more than 5 minutes is the day that they can start asking this question with more than a houseplant’s intelligence.  If asked, you can try humor (on my personal island), give some amorphous answer about having moved up in the company you’re currently interviewing with, or, if you’re senior enough, ask the interviewer if, in this economy, the interviewer him or herself has the faintest clue what is going to happen five years from now.  If you’re an employer, immediately stop asking this ridiculous question.

Go for interview questions that actually let you get to know a bit about the individual, require specific examples, and actually give you information.  Don’t ask these rote questions out of a book or put together by the latest and greatest consultant.  Interviewing is an art, not a science.  It is the art of getting to know an individual you’re going to have to work with for a long time (or not these days) in a very few hours.  There are great ways of doing this, but the standard “HR” questions aren’t going to tell you anything useful.

John Heckers, MA, CPC , BCPC, is an executive coach and transition coach in Cherry Creek, Colorado, with over 28 years of experience in helping people with their careers.  He welcomes your emails at jheckers@heckersdevgroup.com.  www.heckersdevgroup.com.  Read his other blogs at http://executiveexpert.blogspot.com and http://employmentskills.blogspot.com.